After a night of drinking

Discussion in 'The Bucket' started by JohnO, Apr 11, 2008.

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  1. JohnO

    JohnO Moderator

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    Brian crept into bed beside his wife who was already asleep. He gave her a peck on the cheek and fell asleep.

    When he awoke he found a strange man standing at the end of his bed wearing a long flowing white robe.

    "Who the hell are you?", demanded Brian, "and what are you doing in my bedroom?"

    The mysterious man answered, "This isn't your bedroom, and I'm St Peter".

    Brian was stunned. "You mean I'm dead? That can't be, I have so much to live for, I haven't said goodbye to my family.... you've got to send me back straight away."

    St Peter replied, "Yes, you can be reincarnated, but there is a catch.
    We can only send you back as a dog or a hen."

    Brian was devastated, but knowing there was a farm not far from his house, he asked to be sent back as a hen.

    A flash of light later, he was covered in feathers and clucking around pecking the ground. "This ain't so bad," he thought until he felt this strange feeling welling up inside him.

    The farmyard rooster strolled over and said, "So you're the new hen. How are you enjoying your first day here?

    "It's not so bad," replied Brian, "but I have this strange feeling inside like I'm about to explode."

    "You're ovulating," explained the rooster, "don't tell me you've never laid an egg before."

    "Never," replied Brian.

    "Well, just relax and let it happen." And so he did, and after a few uncomfortable seconds later, an egg popped out from under his tail. An immense feeling of relief swept over him and his emotions got the better of him as he experienced motherhood for the first time.

    When he laid his second egg, the feeling of happiness was overwhelming and he knew that being reincarnated as a hen was the best thing that had happened to him... ever!!!

    The joy kept coming, and as he was just about to lay his third egg, he felt an enormous smack on the back of his head and heard his wife shouting, "Brian! Wake up, you drunk bastard, you're crapping in the bed."
     
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  3. andybethke

    andybethke Flamingo Tongue

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    ha that is awesome! i may be a redneck lol
     
  4. Eric

    Eric Spanish Shawl Nudibranch

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    Thats the best....
     
  5. andybethke

    andybethke Flamingo Tongue

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    or the worst depending on how you look at it lol
     
  6. aquaboy

    aquaboy Panda Puffer

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    Man, if i dumped in my bed, i would have 31 days of hard labor owed to my parents so they can buy new sheetz......
     
  7. JohnO

    JohnO Moderator

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    But no punishment for being THAT drunk? :)

    John
     
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  9. Bogie

    Bogie Snowflake Eel

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    my wife didn't find it too funny, wonder if mrs exec level won't like it either. I lauged.