arguing with the fiance about fishtanks haha....any seasoned pro's?

Get fish she likes. My wife was pissed for a year when I sold my pair of mated clowns. So long story short I just bought another pair.. We have our diagreements but I know she understands how much I enjoy my tank.


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my wife and i have and do argue about some if not all of the same thing Iv been married three years ;D a hard but good three years. comprimise is the best alternitive IMO and I completly agree with inwall if you could maby get her interested she might be more willing to get a bigger one or start a new one just for her.... just my 2 cents

 

Whatever you do, get it now before you have kids...you'll be lucky to feed the fish much less get a bigger tank!

 

Evalute which is more important the tank or your sanity. Either put your foot down and get it over with or drop the new tank idea. Most women do not like competition for your affection/addiction. Don't get into the habit of buying her something everytime you want something for the tank it will bankrupt you and put more stress on the relationship. My wife of 25 yrs didn't flinch when I told her about my idea for a new hobby mainly because I don't have any other vices I guess. After it was running for about two mos I told her it was going to be a growout tank for my retirement 225g again she didn't blink. Maybe it's because we haven't really ever told each other what we should spend OUR OWN EARNINGS ON!!! GROW A PAIR!!!

 

Well, it also depends on what her major objections are.

If it's because she is worried about you spending too much time on your hobby and not other important things (her, kids, ect) then you'll probably need to figure out some compromise!

If it's the cost, then consider buying things in peices over a longer span of time.

My girlfriend (maybe soon to be fiance, ya never know ) didnt like all the financial aspects of starting my tank, since we're fairly newly out of school and on our own feet. Our compromise was that I have put together my equipement VERY slow, and pounced on deals when I found them. I also started with a FOWLR to save on the cost of lights.

I've also got to agree with what people are mentioning about getting her involved. My girlfriend was super indifferent about it (she only really liked it because she thought it would be a good decorative feature). However, I had her help me with the layout of the rockwork and suddenly she started enjoying it more. I am sure the same will be true once I started adding fish!

 

Alot of marital arguements/disagreements, when you boil them down, revolve around money/finances. The reason she most likely does not feel enthused about your new plans is because she see's that as "alot" of money going away monthly.

Talk with her about perhaps a budget. Build in incriments. Shop for deals. Not to mention that a budget would probably be good for your personal savings as well. See what the recurring monthly costs add up to, and then add on $xx amount for livestock and such, something you both can agree on. Talk about getting a tank for christmas/birthday, and then each month spending $xx on equipment. It isnt going to happen overnight, but it's better then never, or a pi$$y wife.

If mama ain't happy, nobody's happy...

 

Hahaha, there was no need to read past the first reply.....and it doesn't have to be as expensive. It has to appear to be more expensive.

 

Worked like a charm, of course my initial cost were lower than the upgrades and running costs ;D
After that, shell hate your hobby and you'll just live with it. Enjoy

 

Maybe it's because we haven't really ever told each other what we should spend OUR OWN EARNINGS ON!!! GROW A PAIR!!![/QUOTE]

Ya what he said!! Anyway I have been lucky. Amazing how such a little rock causes the female to change. My wife knows when I really want something I AM going to get it. Period. So for the most part she rolls with it. As far as the tank when I broke my hand(s) and she had to help me with the tank alot she started getting into it. Now she would spend more then I would especially at the coral frag stores.

Good luck

 

Ya what he said!! Anyway I have been lucky. Amazing how such a little rock causes the female to change. My wife knows when I really want something I AM going to get it. Period. So for the most part she rolls with it. As far as the tank when I broke my hand(s) and she had to help me with the tank alot she started getting into it. Now she would spend more then I would especially at the coral frag stores.

Good luck[/QUOTE]

haha thats great tbelt. the same thing happened with my mom when i left for school. I have also got two of my ex girlfriends pretty into the hobby. Its a bit addictive id say.