Oh Mother...

So am I being abused? I honestly don't think so sinc I've gotten used to it after a while, but I will admit trying to be on her good side is sometimes difficult cuz she makes it so damn difficult

 

It's a fine line sometimes, I wouldn't decide which it is lightly.

Based on what you said, she's not physically abusive. But she could be emotionally abusive. Emotional abuse is a very hard thing to show and only you know what she is really like.

Some people are just difficult. Some people are normal with a few abusive episodes. And some people are just abusive.

 

I'd think normal with a few abusive episodes then; I kinda exaggerated when I said she does stuff like this everyday; then again I don't see her as often as I used to ever since she opened up a store

 

It may just be her stressed.

I suggest you say something to her when you are both in a neutral situation and there is no pressure. Something simple like it bothers me when you say things like that.

She is only human, and sometimes things just slip by us, but if you make it know to here that it is bothering you, she will more then likely think before she says it again like that.

Emotional abuse is a very hard thing to prove, and Im sure you love your mom, odds are its just being overly stressed and she doesnt realize that she takes it out on you.


-just the psychology side of me..... 4 years and it really starts messing with you

 

I can understand where your getting at...But im thick skinned...I wrestle at my HS, im pretty BA...No one at my school(well in my classes really messes with me). And for the most part, my mom does the same stuff to me..My dad does the same also, i dont really care..

 

I don't really think I'm qualified to say this but:

if it's rare and only emotional abuse. It's a sign of immaturity on her part. Some effect will be mitigated if you realize that. I would try to ride it out honestly. As this would make your life very turbulant if you contact child services and it's hard to prove so you may just be back in a worse situation.


In no way am I telling you to not seek help if you really need it.

 

good comments from everyone on this thread IMHO

Just wanted to make this point again

would you say it happens every day
every week?
for a couple of days or so once per month ? ( for natural reasons that can prompt very foul moods IME)
its happened 3 times in 2010?

etc
perspective is whats required in situations like these IMO

I lived in a home where the threat of violence was considered a legitimate method of controlling my brother and I

"Wait till your father gets home" was my mothers ultimate weapon once David and I hit our teenage years, simply because by this time we where as tall as our mother and the slaps that had us in tears when younger , caused nothing but laughter once we had achieved adolescence

My father was a "dont ask any questions, just give the boys a wallop and then eat my dinner" type of guy
anything for a quite life, so whack, whack, OK love whats for tea then

Dave and I , lived through it
never did us any long term harm
it was not every day, it was every so often

and both parents where good people IMHO

teenage lads, can be a handful - I know Dave and I where for certain
(I wont go into details, but fortunately records dont count once your 16 in the UK so the past was buried)

the main thing as Sostoudt points out, is that you learn from this
I know I have, and I parent in a different manner to my parents
and a manner that makes me happy

so I am grateful to them for teaching me something very valuable

Steve

 

I guess like a few times over the year, but it never really caused me any emotional harm; I'm just saying that I really hate it when she gets in a bad mood. Heck I'm taller then her and she'll still whoop my @$$ XD

 

Have you ever sat with both your parents and had a talk about things? You are not a kid anymore, you have enough brains to realize it isn't right so use your brains to resolve it. Your Mom is running a business I'm sure she has conflict resolution skills i.e. Customer Service Skills so use that to your advantage. Ask her how she would feel if the situation was reversed. Be mature with your statements, give exact examples and above all else be non-confrontive. Do you ever get in a bad mood lets say 2 or 3 times a year? I'm a parent of two teenage boys we often have conversations about how we feel about certain situations. Regular family sit down diners are a good place to begin. Maybe take the initiative and cook something simple for your parents and invite them to diner.

 

i cannot agree more.
if you do not feel like you have to see a counselor, I would recommend not allowing it to bother you because her behavior will not change in the upcoming years. If it is an issue then you should confront her and get professional (counselor or psychologist) individuals involved.

It sounds to me like she has a hyper-critical nature and possibly even a controlling attitude. Her behaviors can be a function of many things, some of which could be detrimental to her health (manic depression, bi-polar, tumors, paranoia/anxiety).

I have experienced a similar situation within my own family; so i can tell you from experience that if you can make an educated, well thought out, and mature decision about this situation then you should do so... to prevent any future issues. Additionally, I am also pursuing a degree in clinical neuropsychology so I have daily experience with these situations in people, papers, and patients.